THE JOYS OF CEREBRAL FERVOR

By H. N. Burdett

I would have to reach well back into the past, more than three decades, to remember the last time I encountered Severna Park, Maryland schoolteacher Jim Hoage. But he left an indelible impression.

Jim is among those rare birds one both enjoys and respects for their clear-headed, yet passionate cut-to-the-chase worldview. Not only can he dish it out eloquently and concisely, he can back it up with legitimate facts, figures and citations for anyone who might demand such and is willing to read, listen and learn.

Let me hasten to add that while Jim has always worn his progressivism proudly as well as gracefully, I have friends from the opposite end of the political spectrum who share his ability to communicate which, for lack of a more precise term I can only characterize as cerebral fervor.

Though the cheap alibi of time and circumstance has precluded Citizen Hoage and me from having even a single phone conversation in all too many years, I am delighted to report that 30 or more years have neither mellowed his progressive allegiance or drained his ink well.

Jim still writes provocative letters to the editor: a perfect forum for someone of his bent who worships at the lonely but hallowed altar of brevity. After encouraging a few friends to glance at Jim's most recent offering in my hometown newspaper, the Annapolis Capital, I was pleased to learn that most had already seen it. Moreover, and this pleased me even more, more than a few assured me they look forward to reading any editorial page letter bearing the signature of James Hoage, Severna Park.

I will not go so far as to suggest that there is a Jim Hoage Cult alive and well in Anne Arundel County, but I certainly hope so. I also have a strong hunch that not all of Jim's fans have met him personally. Over the past few days I've heard his name mispronounced at least three different ways, no easy feat for a two-syllable name which often enough is botched into one. I won't bother to present the correct pronunciation here, instead choosing to enthusiastically reprint his Monday, June 27 letter to the editor in its entirety:

Cut the Fat

House Speaker John Boehner wants $2 trillion in (federal budget) cuts. But he and other Republicans want them to be in what middle class and poor people need. Instead, the GOP should look across the river (toward the Pentagon) and feast their eyes on pork and the corporate welfare. They should:

1. Trim five of the 11 aircraft carriers. The Chinese will soon have DF-21 missiles that can easily blow a carrier out of the water along with its 5,000-man crew. Save $75 billion.

2. Cut all the F-35 fighters. The F-15's, F-16's and F-18's we now have are fine. Use more drones. Build one new sub a year, not two. Save a whopping $676 billion.

3. Cut the Reagan relics, the Cold War missiles/nuclear weapons. Save $80 billion.

4. Trim troops to 0.7 million from 1.3, bases to 300 from 500, generals/admirals to 500 from 952. Stop 57 K "re-up" bonuses. Make it "25 and out," not 20. Save an admirable $487 billion!

5. Trim our 17 spy groups who gather more "intelligence" than they can study. Save $152 billion.

6. Bring home now the 100,000 troops in Afghanistan. Avoid quagmire. Save $350 billion.

7. Zero-base the whole Pentagon budget: justify each item each year. Save $180+ billion.

There's your $2 trillion. But if a little pork/corporate welfare is a must, compensate: Axe the Bush tax cuts for the rich and impose a minimum corporate income tax.

Ordinary Americans are wising up. A respectable poll finds 55 percent favor military cuts but only 21 percent Medicare cuts and only 13 percent Social Security cuts.

On Aug. 3, if Republicans prove pigheaded, Reggie Retiree may find no Social Security check in his mailbox. But Reggie shouldn't have to fear doomsday; it should be the pork chasers and corporate welfare queens who feed at the Pentagon trough.

JAMES HOAGE
Severna Park, MD